Mel

 

Hey supermodel!

 

Not to sound weird…

BUT

You have grown to be so beautiful! I saw your pics on the blog...mmmm, could make some rands off it on the internet

(hee hee just kidding)

And you are studying the most interesting and unique subject I have heard of in a while!

 

Brains and beauty, how DO you DO it?

 

well I'll be blogged down...

 

 

One of my posts blogged itself! the blog is FIXED

 

TESTING

my blog is broken!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

my excitement quota is low

It is actually running on empty

 

 

 

sans life the movie

Sometimes, when the music plays loudly in the car, I can imagine my life to be a movie. 

 

I look out the window, at the peole and landscapes and can sometimes hear the commentator announce:

 

"They were travelling towards Johannesburg, the city that never sleeps, and at that moment, felt that the world was their oyster..."

 

Bla bla bla.....I r sentiMENTAL...

 

whoops

I had another whoops night...

 

We were at Stones in Centurion..and after a couple of vodka's and jager bombs, I was saying

"ALOHA!!!! KONICHIWA!!!!" to everybody.

 

(please note that this was complete with hand signals and a high pitched voice)

 

Say it with me: WHOOPS!!!!

strange but true

The egg supplier at Fruit & Veg City are:

 

Whol Fhart...

 

(say it out loud)

Michie-moo

Michie...

 

Please drop me a mail with your wedding pictures! I sent you an e-mail today so that you will have my mailing adress...

mmmmmmmmmm

Our cleaning lady has it in for me...

 

She dishes out the smallest piece of cake to me...

Brought my lunchbox back broken...

and now she skips me for tea...

 

 

 

BEE COMPLIANT FABLE CHANGES

1. SNOW WHITE - COAL BLACK

2. GOLDILOCKS - DREADLOCKS

3. HANSEL & GRETEL - SIPHO & THANDI

4. JACK & THE BEANSTALK - ZUMA & THE DAGGA PLANT

5. LIEWE HEKSIE - LOVELY FELICIA

6. RED RIDING HOOD - RIDING IN THE HOOD

7. THE WOLF - THOKELOSH

8. THE THREE LITTLE PIGS - GOODNESS, GIFT & PRECIOUS

9. BARBIE - MODJADJI

10. LITTLE MERMAID - LITTLE MAID

11. THE SMURFS - THE FREEDOM FIGHTERS

12. ALICE IN WONDERLAND - BUSI IN GAUTENG

13. CINDERELLA - CINDERFIKILE

14. THE EMPOROR'S NEW CLOTHES - MBEKI GOES GUCCI

15. THE PRINCESS AND THE PEA - MANTO AND THE AFRICAN POTATO

 

 

Comebacks

comebacks:

 Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today.

 You are so loved that you will end up dying in your own arms.

 You are so ugly, when you asked for plastic surgery the doctors cut up your credit cards.

 You are so old your birth certificate says expired on it.

 Like most guys you are vacant, engaged or full of crap.

 If you need space, join NASA. (BEST COMEBACK I HAVE HEARD in a while)

You are so short, you can walk under your bed without hitting your head.

 I need an incurable disease more than I need you.

 You go to the dentist twice a year. Once for every tooth.

 Hello, tall, dark and obnoxious.

 You were one of the first to get a brain, before they were perfected.

 You say you have a mind of your own. You're welcome to it, who else would want it.

 

petty

I might be petty, but I was given the smallest piece of cake at work today, and I am a little sad...

 

It was a little sliver...

 

Going to buy a chocolate now, to compensate, have not had one in a while...

the cream conspiracy

When I was born and right up and til the age of 13, my mom bought me cream.( I am talking about body cream here...or body lotion)

 

And ever since then, I have received cream for b-days and xmas etc...

 

At present I have 6 big bottles of cream  in my cupboard and 5 of them are still full, the sixth one is three quarters full.

 

The point I am trying to make, is that I have never bought my own cream...

 

 

beauty amidst poverty

This is not my own photo, but TAPE ART. I just though it is relevant...

There is a rundown building in Ferndale with the white paint chipping off, and pieces off the wall broken out.

But, it has the most exquisite carved wooden door, still in tact, standing strong.

The door looks completely out of place, but that is what it makes it even more breathtaking.

Full circle moments

When I was about 16, we made a trip to Johannesburg. (That was when I still lived in Margate and my idea of a cool holiday was coming up to Gauteng)

 

My brother took us to Sandton square in the evening and while walking, a street musician started playing on his saxophone. (That was the night that I fell in love with the instrument)

 

We went on training on Tuesday (at Sandton square) and it was the same place I had heard the guy play and had wished I could live here.

 

So, I guess I could say that I stick to my goals...

Something else you should try

The spinach and feta quiche at Fourno's bakery...

Those guys do things to eggs that your momma has not even thought about!

 

Doing the laundry

I took my wet washing, a R5 coin and newspaper down to my laundry.

 

I sat on the chair, read the paper and waited for my washing to finish.

 

I have ALWAYS wanted to do that.

 

Things you have to try when you are alone on valentine's day

****Dischem Luxury Foam Bath (it makes Bold and the Beautiful love-scenes style foam)

 

****Woolies Chocolate fudge brownie ice cream (mmmm)

 

Well, something you should not try is putting rose petals in your bath, it looks and smells great. BUT, the problem comes in when you let the bath water out, coz where do the petals go?

 

I spent a good couple of minutes trying to hand pick the petals out of the drain...

not so romantic...quite gross, actually

Ant problem at work

Hee hee, I work at the coolest place, check this:

Hi All

 We seem to have delopved a wee little “Elite Ant farm”

 Should you be “stashing” sweets or any other type of food in your desk drawers, please bring some Tupperware/ice cream type containers to store this in so that the little critters cant smell/get at the food.

 Thanks

 V

 

 

Another hectic weekend

Liezl and I had the most Fawesome weekend!

I am so dead tired at work though, I have noticed that something is "wrong" with me every Monday morning, since I have started working here.

The first weekend: my voice was gone on the Monday

Last weekend: I had sunstroke and moaned about the aircon being too hot the whole time

This weekend: I look tired and flu-ish, yawning the whole time, I have to focus extra hard..zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I see a pattern here!

All recipients

Claud sends the following e-mail to all of us:

 

Don't respond to all  - just me !

 

All you have to do is Email me one memory that you and I had together.

It doesn't matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you can remember!

 

Next, send this to all of your friends and see how many people have a memory about you.

 

It's actually pretty cool (and funny) to see the responses

 

One of the recepients replies to EVERYBODY:

 

ur ten step move

ps. happy birthday sister :)

Regards

Somebody else (one of the 'All Recipients') says:

We would all like to know about your 10 step move!!

Indulge all.............!!!!!

Kind Regards,

Claudette says:

LETS JUST SAY....

It’s a secret way of catching men!

Kind Regards,

Obviously, now everybody is interested and the singles start mailing:

I need to know what your ten step move is. Help me honey, I am newly single

Many Thanks,

And the singles reply to one another:

Hi,

I am also single, not newly - Perhaps we can teach each other moves......

Kind Regards,

And all the while, Poor Fred (one of the "all recipients" is out of the office) We just keep getting this automated reply from his e-mail box:

I am currently on leave and will be returning to the office on the 26th February 2007. I will not have access to my mails during this time. For any work related matters you may contact ...

 

 

 

 

Yeah..breakfast!

This is one for Mel...

 

My attempts at trying to explain Casper de Vries jokes to people has hardly been successful so far.

Thus, me trying to do it now, is quite risky..I am going out on a limb here...

 

Cassie was talking about different accents and cultures. He says the Americans applaud for everything (think about all the American talk shows)

 

For instance, Presenters would ask an audience member where he comes from, and he would reply Kansas / whatever and everyone would applaud and cheer.

 

"Give me a K ! gimme an - A ! Gimme a .....Yeah! Kansas!"

 

..and so on

 

To prove how different South African audiences are, Casper asked one of the South African audience members where he comes from, he replied 'Welkom' The audience was dead quiet.

 

Proves a point doesn't it?

 

Then Cassie took the idea further (he always does that, I love his sense of humour)

He says that the Americans cheer for everything...you could ask somebody what they are busy doing, and the person would reply:

 

" I just had breakfast"

 

And the presenter and audience would cheer on it:

 

"YEAH!  BREAKFAST! RIGHT ON!"

 

Ok, you are probably all sitting there, thinking, San, WHAT are you trying to say, it is not funny..but, if you know me well enough, you would know I am not good at telling jokes.

 

On that note: What is brown and flat and stuck to the bottom of an elephant's foot?

 

A bushman that was too slow...

 

(Hee hee, just had to throw in that one liner..)

Wise words

My Internet buddy and I came to a conclusion:

 

It must be easier for 'kommin 'people to date.

Think about it (I am sure they don't)

 

-"Kommin" people don't wonder about the meaning of love

 

-Or read too much into why things happen

 

-They call each other 'bokkie' en 'flikflooi' and just try and score each other at the drive thru

 

 

 

 

Ok, so I notice signs

@ our roadside cafe here in the office block

 

DRINK MORE COFFEE:

Then you can do more stupid things, faster and with more energy!

 

On the bins here in Joburg

 

PIKI-TUP

 

 

 

The end of Daily Dose

I am sorry to all those of you who liked this feature on my blog.

 

BUT, it will be discontinued as from today.

 

I got tired of analyzing everything,

 jeepers,

you can't go through life like that, I will drive myself insane...

Straight outta Benoni

Liezl r coming from Benoni!

 

Staying the WHOLE weekend...it will be like high school all over again..I plucked my eyebrows with her for the first time.

 

You really build a special bond with someone who has grooms your brows..in a very monkey-picking-fleas-off-her-baby-monkey-kind-of-way

 

Ahem, ok getting carried away with myself again, hold on, while I attempt to pull myself towards myself.

 

 

my PC loves me

Aaaaw...it has only been three weeks, but my PC already has a crush on me...

 

I started typing my name, and by the time I got to the hi-fin part..

 

it prompted the rest of my name and surname...

 

Ooooh..

 

 

another CV joke

Ha ha...

 

The candidate went to "Saamwerk High School" 

 

ice cream

 

 

 

This is the cooolest job ever (literally)

 

On Friday, our Office Support Manager bought ice cream for everbody...

 

This was the pic she sent to bribe us all

Wittiest comment of the day award

My internet buddy (don't know what else to call you, seeing as though I am not allowed to call you Dude..AND...I don't think you want your name on my blog just yet)

 

Anyway, My internet buddy and I have the coolest conversations...

 

He offered a piece of bananna to somebody at work and she said, she would rather have a piece of biltong.

 

So I said to him: At least she did not ask for BOERIE...(boerewors)

 

He says: No she is Halaal

 

There was a bit of a pause, before he came back with THE WITTIEST COMMENT OF THE DAY:

 

"Ek sal moet uit Halaal en wys!!!!"

 

 

 

 

The food group family

I have a...

 

Tannie Bessie

Oom Kool

Oom Bok

Tannie Koekie

Recruitment news

Listen to this one

 

(on a candidate's CV)

 

Duties:

"Photocopying"

 

Mmmm..how very aspirational 

 

BAD SERVICE

My pet peeve, is bad service!!!!!!

 

That entails not returning my calls, being slack and just plain dof!

 

I mean, I am paying for a service and I expect to get the help!

 

Ugh!

 

I think it is time to post a comment on hellopeter...

 

(then at least I am channeling my frustrations to the right people)

 

Marco...Poloooooooo

Claud and I had such a "Marco-Polo" moment this weekend

 

She shouted: SAN-MARiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

(from one end of the complex)

And I would reply: CLAUDETTE-E-Tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

(from my end)

Sans Snippet

When I really feel at home somewhere, I buy a house plant (I have only bought two house plants for my houses so far)

 

 

 

The weeeeeeeekend baby

I am such a house wife already, my goodness (see, I even say 'my goodness')

I baked and cooked the whole weekend...

Friday: Pork schnitzel, veggies and baked potatoe for me and Claudette - e - tie

Saturday: Pork rib tjops,cauliflower au gratin in white sauce, beans and potato wedges

Sunday: Lemon delight tart and chocolate muffins with a caramel filling

Not to mention all the lunches inbeteween..and the refreshments I poured...

What is happening?

My two best friend's weddings!

Two of my best friends are getting married this week!

Chantelle was on Sunday

Michelle on Friday

May fortune always smile on you...

Love you gals/ladies!!!

flag system

If claud stands on tip toe and leans over her balcony railing in a "almost-falling-off" kind of angle, she can see a little bit of my bedroom window!

 

How cool is that?

 

Would a flag system not be great for communicating?

 

A green flag means: I r coming over

A red flag means: I r not coming over

 

And so on..you get the message, right?

 

 

 

anything for the sake of blog

 

Hi all...

 

This is a test blog to see if this blog2e-mail facility works!

 

Ever since we got the web filter at work, blogging has become amazingly difficult! Well, actually IMPOSSIBLE...

 

But my IT beeeeeeeech (hee hee..I lurve you, you know that, you used that word last time anyway) Anyhoo, he helped me set up this blog2e-mail thang, hope it is working...