Meet the village idiot

I share our living space with a complete idiot...(this idiot is obviously not Clinton)

Some reasons why I believe he is the village idiot:

Mistaken uses for things

• Using a couch as a clothes cupboard
• Using a couch as a bed for your weird, sweaty, shirtless friends..in SUMMER, without sheets!
• Using the shower as a towel rack
• Using the bathroom as the place to plug in electrical appliances (Can you say fire hazard??)
• Using the floor as a plate (well, it looked like it the one day)

Pushing the sound barrier

• Having a selection of the MOST annoying ring tones and SMS alerts...seriously! (who needs peace and quiet?)
• Not switching your alarm off on weekends, meaning we get woken up at the crack of 05:30 each Saturday / Sunday - to the BEEP BEEP BEEP sound (who needs to sleep in on weekends?)
• Putting the TV volume so high that I can share the TV experience, from my bedroom (who needs 2 TV's)

Not being self sufficient, at the ripe age of 24

• Not having your own bank account at the age of 24. Instead, your mommy handles your finances
• Having your mommy phone at odd hours of the morning, to find out where you are and what you are doing
• Relying on your best friend to move YOUR stuff into the flat
• Not being able to organise a lift to the airport on your own

Bad Personal Hygiene

• Having a dettol container that is BROWN and smells like something dead and rotting
• Putting your hairbrush on the TOILET
• Serving your date mouldy bread to eat, hmmmm, yum yum

Random things that just make no sense:

• Having 3 toothbrushes and 4 half-finished toothpaste tubes for just ONE person
• Faking a qualification

Being attracted to shiny things:

• The first time he brought a girl over, there was this shiny glitter stuff all over the house ( I actually still found one of these glitter things, the other day, 5 months later) And now, I assume it is a new girl, there is AGAIN shiny glittery stuff everywhere. (proof that he is attracted to shiny things)

Decor

• An earth globe in a clear perspex cube - displayed on the TV Cabinet in our lounge
• A fake gold coin in a clear perspex cube - displayed on the TV Cabinet in our lounge
• A Tequila mat (that he stole out of a bar) - displayed on the TV cabinet in our lounge
• Coasters with alcoholic logo's (which again, was stolen out of a bar) - displayed on the TV Cabinet in our lounge
• A remote control car - displayed on the TV cabinet in our lounge
• A Strobe light - DISCO, DISCO! - Displayed next to the TV cabinet in our lounge